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Today , I wrote about the feeling of rejection because I noticed that this sentiment is largely related to our emotional suffering. I think it is important to learn to handle rejection because this feeling is part of life and we find it in many situations of everyday life. The fear of being rejected is one of the biggest fears of mankind because we are social beings and group life is of extreme importance to us. But with rejection it is the feeling of being excluded, not feeling loved, feel discriminated, humiliated or /and not accepted by social groups, family, a partner, a leader, etc. . Rejection transmits the sensation of something in you that needs to be changed and you can not be accepted as you are. Rejection is an horrible feeling, it hurts us and hurts us .

Researches in the field of neuroscience have shown that the pain of rejection activates the same areas of the brain related to physical pain. When we feel physical pain, we often go to the doctor or taking medication or treatment, to end this unpleasant sensation. But when we have emotional pain, there is no convenient and fast way that we can cope with this un pleasant feeling. We are all vulnerable to suffering rejection and being injured. I 'm sure everyone has had the experience of being rejected. This feeling of being rejected, we felt for the first time at the time of birth (the separation from our mother through the umbilical cord rupture). During our childhood, this feeling may gain power based on our education, most of the severe challenges, and our relationship with our parents. When we were little, we heard a lot of "no" and we kept the feeling of not being accepted and loved as we would have liked to be. All and all, we have this need to belong to a social group and, in this way, we reject a part of ourselves to be accepted. This kind of situation occurs because the parents, society and school, want to change the child to fit society. It is important to educate children but it is not healthy to transmit the rules of a society aggressively because the child may lose its spontaneity. Such experiences can thus cause feelings of rejection and guilt feeling imperfect and / or unable to satisfy everyone. Will not accept the resignation. This is not a league with our mistakes. To accept is to feel compassion and kindness for ourselves. We become aware of our strengths and we do not focus solely on our shortcomings. I am convinced that the rejection should not affect our happiness. A healthy attitude is to understand that rejection is part of life and that we need to know how recover energies, how facing rejection, and how find the strength to start over. Let's be clear on how many things we deprive ourselves for fear of being rejected. The fear of being rejected is an obstacle to success.

We often hear "no" throughout our entire existence. So :

- Failure is our learning

- The yes is our challenge

The person who feels rejected understands that something is wrong. But we are free to choose. Someday, we will also reject a person or an opportunity, etc. Nobody can force anyone to love us, as we are not obliged to love anyone. But it is essential to keep the respect in relationships. Indeed, I believe that everyone is interconnected. When accepting someone would seem particularly hard, is important to look at the parts of ourselves that hinder us. We project onto others what we reject in ourselves. Rejection leaves marks on self-esteem. Failure to treat can make the person more bitter and closed. To overcome this situation, we can meditate, undergo psychotherapy, etc. Everyone must find the best for herself / himself. Rejection shows that we have limits and we can not do everything. Fear of being rejected limits us and deprives us of many things in life.

Below are some tips for dealing with releases:

- Recognize that anyone may be rejected;

- Allow yourself to feel bad at the beginning;

- It is normal to feel bad : by cons , do not let yourself be overwhelmed by this feeling over time;

- Do not take it as a personal offense.

- Stay positive (remember your accomplishments);

- Be generous with yourself (eg, doing things you like)

- Keep faith in yourself;

- Never give up on your goals .

Gabriela Prado

Psychologist

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